Best Man Tips

It's now time to turn our attention to the speech itself. There are four key things you need to know about a best man speech:

how to write it
what to put into it (and what not to)
how to deliver it
what toast (if any) to propose with it

Do not, under any circumstances, try to deliver an off-the-cuff speech. Always have it written and well rehearsed. But don't be afraid to alter it on the day and add in ad-libs as you go along. Something may happen on the wedding day that you will want to refer to, or something may be said in one of the preceding speeches that you will want to respond to in yours. So long as you keep to the basic structure of the speech you have written, and don't go so far off at a tangent that you lose your place altogether, appropriate ad-libs will add to the fun and enjoyment.

When to start work on the speech? That's simple: now! It is never too soon to make a start on writing your speech. The sooner you start, the more relaxed you can be about it. Leaving it to the last minute is the surest way of getting into an unproductive panic. In fact, it is a very good idea to have the speech written, if possible, some weeks before the wedding and then to leave it to one side for a while. When you come back to it nearer the day, you will be able to look at it with a fresh eye, and you may spot things that you want to alter or improve.

First of all, two words of warning about what you should not do:

Do not sit down at your computer, or at a table with a blank piece of paper, and expect to write your speech straight off from the beginning through to the end. The chances are, you will still be staring at a blank screen or a blank sheet of paper an hour or two later while you try to think up that great opening line you want for your speech. Your opening line has to be the first thing you say, but it doesn't have to be the first thing you write.

Do not wait for inspiration. Thomas Edison, the inventor of the lightbulb, once said that 'genius is one per cent inspiration and ninety-nine per cent perspiration'. The same is true of writing a speech. If you start work on your speech, inspiration will come; if you decide not to start work on your speech until inspiration comes, you could wait a long time. If the ideas don't come at first, don't sit despairing at your desk. Leave the speech alone, and let your subconscious mind work on it for a few days. You'll be amazed at how the very words and ideas you are looking for can unexpectedly come to mind.